Fraternity House director to step down

By: EZEKIEL GUZA - Staff Writer | Friday, June 23, 2006 9:53 PM PDT ∞

SAN MARCOS ---- Molly Henry, executive director of Fraternity House, a live-in care facility for patients with AIDS and HIV, is stepping down on Friday after seven years in the position.

The house, which looks like a normal residence inside and out, houses eight men and offers round-the-clock care on three levels, transitional, long term and hospice.

Henry said she is leaving to spend more time with her 8-year-old daughter, Morgan, and because she said she was becoming too synonymous with the organization.

"I think an agency shouldn't be identified too much with its executive director," she said. "A month ago or so I told somebody I might be leaving frat house and his response was 'But you are frat house, you can't leave' and that's when it really clicked for me,"

Henry said she has learned two valuable lessons after seven years in the position.

The first is to laugh.

"You have to have a sense of humor around here," she said. "The residents who make it the longest are the ones who laugh. Sometimes you have to laugh until your stomach hurts."

Henry said what she will miss the most about the job is the funny conversations she's had with residents.

"Most of them aren't fit for print," Henry joked. "We have so many characters in here and you never know what's going to happen."

The second lesson is to appreciate every day.

"After being here a few years I began to realize that life is really short. I started thinking 'If I died tomorrow what haven't I done that I would want to do?' so I actually bought a Harley Davidson motorcycle and got my license."

Patrick Anderson, the president of Fraternity House Inc., said in a statement: "I cannot overstate the contribution that Molly has made to our organization, She has fought tenaciously for us at times when our very survival was at stake and has kept us going while similar organizations have faltered and closed."

Among the issues that Henry handled during her tenure was controversy over whether the home was creating too much traffic in its rural neighborhood and claims by neighbors that it was creating waste in the area. In December 2004, during a meeting attended by nearly 200 people, the San Marcos Planning Commission granted the home a five-year permit that required it meet certain conditions governing everything from parking to getting permits for special events.

Replacing Henry is Marie Jones-Kirk, who began volunteering at the home in August of 2004.

"If you told me a year ago that I'd be the executive director I'd have thought you were crazy," Jones-Kirk said. "But I'm definitely honored."

Henry said Jones-Kirk has shown she is more than ready to take over as director.

"That made a huge difference knowing you have someone who is capable," Henry said. "Otherwise I would have stayed here because I care too passionately to hand it off to someone I didn't think could handle it."

The friends share a tragic bond, having both lost brothers to AIDS.

Jones-Kirk's brother, Robert Jones, died in September 2004, while Henry's brother, Blake Henry, died May 1, 1996.

Jones-Kirk said she cared for her brother while he was ill.

"So much of what I do here and what I see in the residents and what their needs are I saw in my brother," she said. "He's really a driving force in what I do at Fraternity House."

Henry said that the memory of her brother was a motivating factor for her involvement in Fraternity house as well, and said the 10-year anniversary of his death on May 1 served as a symbol.

"Life changes, you grow and you move on," she said. "In some respects I think (the anniversary) was one more thing telling me it was time to do something different."