Temecula survives 'Monologues'

By: PHIL STRICKLAND - Staff Writer | Friday, February 15, 2008 8:08 PM PST ∞

The vaginas, coochiesnorchers and other appellations for the female reproductive organ have come and gone ---- at least from public utterance ---- and we stand unbowed.

Indeed, aside from filling the community theater in Old Town Temecula to raise money for the anti-domestic violence crusaders, Safe Alternatives for Everyone, the most remarkable thing about the performances of the controversial "Vagina Monologues" is that the play, as obscenity, is pretty much unremarkable.

Youth fare on cable television puts this to shame.

The players were fine, even impassioned, and the finger foods and wine available for the hour prior to the Valentine's Day performance were a nice touch for us romantics who proudly presented our special someones with tickets to celebrate our love. (We romantics are nothing if not vagina-friendly.)

But, in spite of the abundance of material that polite society would find objectionable, the play itself has not aged well if it's shock you seek. The words, over the course of the play's 10-year life, pretty much have been relegated to the rocking chair as the debasement of our culture thrives.

The message, however, is as urgent as ever.

"Is this where you get tickets for the ventriloquist show?"

The three ladies, nonplussed as you please, chuckled graciously at the feeble humor and joined the fun by asking the well-seasoned male member of the species for a birth certificate as proof of age for admittance to the performance.

As it turned out, proof of age wasn't necessary. Neither was arriving an hour early Wednesday to secure a seat for the dress rehearsal of the play that has fueled a tempest here.

But by staging an open rehearsal, SAFE was able to meet the excess demand that saw more than 100 patrons bearing $15 each show up to support the cause. Aside from some of the language assaulting sensibilities, it could have been any performance.

It's been billed as the realization by women of their womeninity by their celebration of the particular organ that, as described in one of the monologues, has the irresistible pull of a vacuum sucking in everything that comes near it. As men, we can attest to that.

Before a full house, and with more than a couple of Temecula's finest outside to thwart any untoward actions by disapproving citizens, a precaution that proved ---- to the credit of objectors ---- unnecessary, director Patti Drew opened the Thursday performance by giving thanks to the women who have become known as the Temecula Six for protesting the play. Protests she figures helped publicize the benefit.

She said that, if as much passion had been brought to the battle against domestic violence as was exhibited over this performance, there would be five women and four police officers who were killed in Riverside County who might be alive today.

Maybe, maybe not, but as worthy as the cause is, it rankled folks who didn't want the 10th V Day ---- Until the Violence Stops staged in our family friendly city.

It's been called pornography. If this is pornography, it is smut that proves women shouldn't be allowed to write porn. It's been called disgusting. And it is. Particularly the parts about female genital mutilation, rape as a tool of war or a benefit for the conqueror and child molestation.

It's been scorched for its filthy language. And there is some, though it did seem to be liberating for the ladies. One word in particular, a vulgar bit of slang for the vagina, actually had some women laughing and applauding. That alone was worth the price of admission.

It's been called a collection of man-hating rants. Only, it appears, where appropriate. And, come on guys, you know we give them enough ammunition ---- though, in fairness, there was one monologue that allowed as how men can serve some purpose.

It's been said the monologues promote lesbianism. There certainly are parts where the lifestyle is portrayed sympathetically ---- even one part where a teen girl is seduced by an older women after being punched "there" by a guy.

An elegant couple from Kansas City, Mo., was having wine outside the theater before the performance Thursday. They were staying in Temecula while visiting relatives in Palm Springs, Los Angeles and San Diego.

We're centrally located and, according to their research, a fun place to visit. They liked Wine Country and Old Town, in fact, the city in general. Very nice, well done, they said, except for a $13 hamburger at one of the wineries. Next was a round of golf in Redhawk and a balloon ride.

So, asked the silver-haired gentleman, what are the political issues?

"This is it."

"This?"

His likewise genteel wife took a sip of wine and asked "Have you seen 'Menopause'"?

Ah, those rascals from the heartland. Who knows, maybe next year? We've proven we can take the hit and all concerned can act like adults. Even when awash in coochiesnorchers.

Phil Strickland is a resident of Temecula and a regular columnist for The Californian. E-mail: philipestrickland@yahoo.com.

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