RANCHO BERNARDO - Misconceptions about Islam, the reality of Muslim women's lives and the hope of building bridges among religious faiths were topics of a panel discussion Wednesday at San Rafael Parish in Rancho Bernardo.

Tehseen Lazzouni, a coordinator of the Islamic Speakers Bureau of San Diego, led the panel discussion, which included seven Muslim women from San Diego County from various backgrounds. After the panelists and Lazzouni spoke, the audience of about 50 people had a chance to ask questions.

Lazzouni said that discussing the similarities between faiths is important, because Muslims, Christians and Jews can all trace their religious roots to one biblical man -- Abraham.

For the event, she said the panelists were trying to put into perspective the lives of "the most misunderstood population -- Muslim women."

"In Islam, a woman's role as a mother and a wife are her most essential roles," said Lazzouni, who added that "more and more women are working outside of the home" as long as the family isn't negatively affected by it.

She also said Muslim women have the same "religious moral duties" as men.

"Muslims believe that God has accorded women the same spiritual qualities as men," she said. "A woman has a right to accept or reject marriage proposals. She also has a right to initiate a divorce."

Lazzouni also said that education is considered to be equally important for women and men under Islamic teaching.

"Parents should ensure that their child is educated," she said. "(They) cannot prefer their sons over their daughters."

A woman asked the panel how they felt about the Sept. 11 tragedies, and other violent acts in which those responsible have claimed to be acting on behalf of Islam.

Lazzouni said Muslim leaders have spoken out against the violence, and the Sept. 11 tragedies.

"There were many Muslim leaders that came out and said this was against Islam," said Lazzouni, who added that the Quran emphasizes peace and not violence. She said self-defense and oppression are the only reasons cited in the Quran where violence can be used on a restrictive basis, and civilians "aren't to be targeted."

"There are people who are breaking the rules," she said. "Those reactions are terrible."

Hibah McNeal, who converted to Islam in college and married a Marine Corps staff sergeant, said the violent acts are not only against Islam, but against God.

"These things are not a part of our religion. They are not a part of our teachings," she said. "The fact that they are Muslim does not condone it."

McNeal suggested that the misconception of Muslims and their Islamic beliefs is fueled by media bias.

"When you read a newspaper, you have to realize that there was a lot of forethought. You have to recognize the perspectives of those involved in bringing the news to you," she said.

Another panelist, Rebecca Darif, who converted from Catholicism to Islam in college, agreed.

"These actions that are taken are wrong, but they don't represent most Muslims," she said. "Unfortunately, those who are the exceptions get all of the (media) attention."

Another audience member asked about the traditional attire of Muslim women, including wearing traditional scarves or covering up from head to foot.

According to Muslema Purmul, whose family came to the United States as refugees of the Soviet-Afghan War, she prefers to dress traditionally.

"As for myself, I felt that wearing a scarf was very liberating," said Purmul, adding that it helps people to "look past the exterior."

Patty Ann Born, a representative of the parish ecumenical/interreligious ministry, said it is important for people to learn more about each other's cultures, and to not be "ignorant" about differences or similarities.

"We definitely seem to fear what we don't know," she said. "This is an opportunity to educate and to meet each other."