FALLBROOK -- For a woman who launched something of an Internet revolution over the public perception of breast-feeding, Kelli Roman's online habits are a bit surprising.

One hour after her children's bedtime and a quick e-mail check during breakfast are apparently all the daily attention required to oversee the movement Roman spurred by starting a chat group on the popular social networking site Facebook.com.

The group -- titled, "Hey, Facebook, breast-feeding is not obscene!" -- has attracted international attention, thrusting Roman, a shy stay-at-home mom, onto the front lines of a public debate over modesty and women's rights.

Facebook, which allows millions of users to connect with friends and meet people with similar interests online, has been deleting photos that show too much skin ever since it started, in keeping with the company's terms and conditions regarding modesty.

But the policy has ruffled feathers from Fallbrook to Canada and beyond when applied to images of nursing mothers.

Deleting photos that depict mothers feeding their children contributes to a widespread perception that breast-feeding in public is immodest and inappropriate, they say.

"Covering it up, hiding it, makes it seem like something to be ashamed of, and I don't like that idea," said Roman, 23.

On a recent afternoon, a laptop computer rested on Roman's kitchen table inside the Fallbrook apartment she shares with her husband and two children: Abe, 3, and Ivy, 22 months.

Outraged by the removal of a photo that showed Roman breast-feeding Ivy in summer 2007, she hooked up with other moms whose breast-feeding photos had been flagged, and began the group that today boasts more than 150,000 members.

Time magazine and "Good Morning America" have recently interviewed Roman, and last week CNN and "Dr. Phil"'s people were getting in on the action.

But the attention hasn't turned her into a media hound.

Instead, she goes about her daily routine, which involves quality time with her two youngsters, lots of health food and no television. During a recent interview, her laptop stayed closed on the kitchen table, while her son tugged at her sleeve for a snack.

"How about a rice cake?" she offered. "Or you could finish your lima beans and lentils."

Status update

Facebook has backed off slightly from its initial crackdown, allowing Roman and others to repost certain images that were previously removed.

But the company maintains that all photos -- whether or not there's a suckling baby in the frame -- must not show a woman's areola, the dark skin around the nipple.

"Photos containing a fully exposed breast (as defined by showing the nipple or areola) do violate those terms and may be removed," the company said in a written statement this week. "These policies are designed to ensure Facebook remains a safe, secure and trusted environment for all users."

Mothers who object to Facebook's handling of their personal pictures say they are most offended by the idea that their photo of a nursing newborn might be labeled "obscene" in the same way an image of a topless partyer would be.

In the spirit of "normalizing" breast-feeding, Roman and her online comrades maintain that Facebook should allow any and all photos of mothers nursing their babies.

Not everyone agrees.

"I totally support a woman's right to post pictures of nursing on Facebook, but why would you want to?" one Facebook member wrote earlier this week on the forum's bulletin board, which as of Thursday afternoon had drawn 20,000 comments. "Couldn't you find a better picture to use with less controversy?"

Another guest said judging whether a picture is sexual in nature is a subjective process, and concluded, "This group is just trying to say that they should be able to show their boobs on Facebook."

Touchy subject

For Roman, and thousands of other women with young children, breast-feeding is a loaded issue, covering everything from economic woes to the objectification of women.

"It's a health issue, a women's rights issue, and a children's rights issue," she said. "And breast milk is free. You don't have to buy bottles or formula or anything."

Facebook's policy against nudity in photos is aimed at protecting its youngest users. Youths as young as 13 are allowed to join; thus, a large portion of Facebook's online community is under 18.

But Roman said she feels that seeing pictures of breast-feeding is not detrimental to kids, as opposed to viewing nudity that is sexual in nature.

"Children need to see women breast-feeding," she said. "They need to see that breasts aren't for sex or to sell you things -- especially the boys -- but they're for nurturing and feeding your children."

Fellow Fallbrook resident Anna Alcorn, 37, who has joined the Facebook breast-feeding movement, said that she had trouble finding advice on nursing when she had her first child, who is now 2 years old.

"If this were something that was more common, I would have felt a lot more confident," said Alcorn. "It's frustrating that I've had no public role models whatsoever."

Alcorn said she prefers the approach to breast-feeding taken in many foreign countries, including Italy, where she lived for a year and a half: "It's normal and natural, and not even given a second thought -- be it on the bus, at the grocery store. Nobody even looks twice."

Stalemate

While Facebook shows no signs of allowing photos of nursing babies if the images show any areola, these women show no willingness to back down, either.

"I understand where (Facebook) is coming from," said Roman. "They're a private Web site, and they're allowed to have rules. But it's not hard to tell the difference between porn and a baby breast-feeding."

Alcorn also vowed to keep fighting.

"I think any picture depicting a mother breast-feeding a child should be tolerated in any media," she said. "This is part of bringing up babies."

Contact staff writer Tom Pfingsten at (760) 740-3516 or tpfingsten@nctimes.com.