At Baker's Square in San Marcos on a recent Thursday night, the talk around the table was about re-electing President Bush, the biased liberal media, the danger of illegal immigration and activist judges.

That same hour, another group of North County residents had gathered at La Tapatia restaurant in Escondido to discuss the importance of electing John Kerry president, how to support other local Democrats and an upcoming anti-Bush film festival.

It's hard to imagine two groups with less in common, yet at their core they really were the same. Both are meetups, groups of people who find one another online and coordinate meetings through a Web site that boasts 1.4 million members.

"This seems like a good place to get in touch with people who are political, and it's a really easy way to get useful information about how to be involved," Rhonda Farrar of Poway said about why she attended the Aug. 26 Kerry meetup in Escondido.

At the Republican meetup, Debbie Lenson of Escondido said the group had been meeting at a bookstore but was asked to stop because political groups weren't welcome. She wondered out loud whether the store would have done the same to Democrats.

Another woman in the group said she had noticed that the book store seemed to have only anti-Bush books in front. No one challenged the claims as overly suspicious.

"In some ways, it's a support group," said Karen Guile of Carlsbad about why she enjoys the Republican meetup.

Like-minded

Political meetups can involve serious strategies for grassroots campaign, but they also can simply be a place for like-minded people to socialize and find a respite from debate and a refuge for similar beliefs and convictions.

"I have a masters in counseling, and one of the things I learned about is the benefit of being around other people who feel the same way," said Debbie Lenson's husband, Bob.

"Personally, I'm eager to talk with people who share the same values as we do," said Graciella Marz at the Republican meetup.

"I don't want to be too warm and fuzzy, but this is like a family," Guile said.

"We like to discuss topics," Daniel Marz said about why he likes the group. "The problem with liberal groups is, they don't want to discuss. They want to lecture."

The folks at the Democratic group in Escondido probably would disagree.

"When we were seated and people were talking and introducing themselves, I found it interesting that there was such a wide variety of people," said Larry Olson of San Marcos about the Kerry meetup. "Housewives, veterans, attorneys, business people. At least two had been Republicans."

Ramona resident and Vietnam War veteran Steve Bisbikis said he attended the Democrat meetup because he was outraged by other veterans who are questioning Kerry's service. Bisbikis said he flew fixed-wing aircraft in the Mekong Delta, and the meetup allowed him a forum to discuss it.

"I just wanted to give people some insight about these Swift Boat guys," he said.

Not just political

Members of the two groups found each other through their politics, but with almost 5,000 topics, meetups are just as likely to be about a favorite TV show, music, books, pets or hobbies.

In North County, 5,600 people are meetup members, according to the Web site MeetUp.com. The first Wednesday of the month lists meetups for those interested in pet adoption, canasta, Democracy for America, author Ken Wilber, attention deficit disorder and Rush Limbaugh. Other North County meetup topics include Buddhism, yarn-swap, Motley Fool, Investors Business Daily and Bookcrossing.

There are no meetups for kinky, hateful or racist subjects, as all topics must be approved by the site. But there are meetups for pug owners, witches, pagans, knitters, moms, new singles, atheists, web designers, and fans of Michael Moore, Sean Hannity, rockabilly, Howard Stern, "Mystery Science Theater 3000," Buffy the Vampire Slayer, naturists, meditation and almost any other topic imaginable.

How it started

Meetup was founded by Scott Heiferman, an entrepreneur in Homewood, Ill. He also founded i-traffic, the first ad agency dedicated to online media, and by 30 he was semiretired and living in New York City.

"His girlfriend dragged him out to see the first 'Lord of the Rings' movie, and there was a big line-party in the middle of New York City," said Myles Weissleder of Meetup.com. "That resonated with him, how these individuals coalesced."

Weissleder said Heiferman had just read "Bowling Alone," Robert Putnam's book about the decline in civic participation and club membership during the past four decades. Putnam observed that even bowling leagues were becoming scarce, and people now have to bowl alone.

Seeing the spontaneous celebration in line, Heiferman believed he had proof that people still would socialize with others who have similar interests, if only they had a chance to meet.

Heiferman saw the Internet, which already had brought people together in chat rooms, message boards and online clubs, as a solution to the bowling-alone syndrome.

"The Internet has done a fantastic job in connecting people who have similar interests … but it really failed miserably with helping people connect face-to-face locally."

With Weissleder and a few other people, he began developing a Web platform that would make it easy for like-minded people to meet in cities worldwide. MeetUp.com was launched as a free service in June 2002. Users can find meet-ups through topics or by location. More than 1,000 cities are registered.

The site immediately was popular with "geeks and freaks," Weissleder said, but it really took off as a political tool.

"MeetUp was put on the map because of politics. We did not build this thing as a political tool, but we knew it could have some ramifications."

The campaign manager of presidential candidate Howard Dean began organizing meetups. Soon Dean had 200,000 supporters, and he was the surprising early front-runner in the campaign.

Dogs and babies

With almost 5,000 topics uniting members, most meetups have nothing to do with politics. At a Poway park last Saturday, pug owners gathered for the first time. At another park in San Marcos later that week, a meetup brought together mothers.

"When I did the search online and saw they had a pug meetup locally, and better yet, right around the corner, that's why we came out," said Keith Hammond of Sabre Springs, who brought his puppy Ruby Delightful to Poway Community Park, where he met Noreen Donohue of Rancho Bernardo and her pug, Buca.

"I'm told there's a lot of pugs here, but I never see them," she said, happy to find a playmate for Buca.

Later that week, Karen Redd of Vista arrived in a San Marcos park with Evan, almost 2, where she had gone to meet other moms in a play-group meetup.

"It's important for kids to be around other kids," she said as Evan played with two other children his age. "They develop social skills and learn from older kids."

Jen Foto of San Marcos brought Spencer, 2 in November, to the park. "We meet moms whenever we can, and it doesn't matter if they're his age," she said. "He just likes to play."

Tayi Matalon's daughter is only 5 weeks old and stayed in her carrier while other children played. "Honestly, it's not about her so much at this point," Matalon said. "We just moved to Vista, and I was looking to meet other moms."

She found a new friend in Kathy Briggs of San Marcos, who was at the park with Tyler, 2. The two sat in some shade, and as Tyler was playing, the young mothers discussed baby care and how nice it is to get a full night's sleep.

"We're looking for more moms with toddlers to get together at parks and have fun and meet friends," Briggs said. "The neat thing is even if one or two people show up, they could be new people and you keep adding to the group."

Bowling together

In honor of the book that inspired their founder, Weissleder said Meetup.com is organizing a national event that will bring back the days of bowling together, at least for one night.

"On Oct. 7, we're holding the great American Meetup Bowloff," he said about the event, which hasn't yet been officially announced. "We're getting together Kerry supporters and Bush supporters for a night of fun."

Kerry supporters will wear blue shirts and Bush supporters red, the colors of the states that have come to represent their two parties on election-night maps. As many as 2,500 bowling alleys may participate, and the site will post the scores of the red and blue teams, he said.

"We're just trying to prove we are united and not divided," he said.

Contact staff writer Gary Warth at gwarth@nctimes.com or (760) 740-5410.